Can you believe it? Leo is now 6.5 months old, and here's the proof that we made it through, fairly unscathed:
With tons of help from Leo's grandparents, I'm a full-fledged happily-single mom now. From the ickiest of spit-up to happy babbling, from mastering the art of baby-carrying to mega-meltdowns in the car, from nursing to solids, from picking up where I left off in school to loads & loads of laundry... Here we are, half a year since my last blog post. Leo is my dream come true, my compass, my motivation to be a better person. My reason for not being able to blog as much!
The complaints are few, and mostly selfish: shorter showers and five-bite meals, an almost non-existent social life with people my age, and not enough piano-playing time to suit my fancy. I am my son's own personal on-demand entertainer extraordinaire - fanning my hands and fingers in the air like a magician gone batty. I find myself humming nursery rhymes even when I'm alone. (The itsy-bitsy spider is a fave). I've become pretty awesome at the following:
changing baby's poopy diapers
washing baby's poopy butt
making really silly faces
blending baby food from scratch
sensing when baby is sleepy, hungry, or bored
creating new, inventive styles of "peekaboo"
trimming teeny-tiny baby fingernails and toenails without too much anxiety
cleaning liquids off my shoulder, lap, or hair
loading and unloading baby equipment out of the car
sneaking out of a room when baby is asleep
completing an average of 3 to 5 chores/errands in 30-minutes or less
avoiding the gouging-out of my own eyes by an infant
The first month seemed like the most difficult. Leo was just soooo tiny and fragile (even though he was pretty big for his age) - and most of the time I was thinking to myself, "If I could just help him survive/thrive this first month, everything will be OKAY." The second month was less anxious, but we weren't exactly relaxed into a routine yet. Month three was fun because Leo was showing the first signs of his "Hi, I'm interactive now" stage. Months 4 and 5 were a blast! We were introduced to two bottom teeth, babbling, giggling & full-on LOL'ing, squealing and top-notch shrieking. This last month has been fun, because we have somewhat of a regular schedule going on now. And though Leo's diapers are stinkier than ever due to solid foods, they are less SCARY and less messy, if you catch my drift. Or maybe I'm just really getting the hang of this!
We just celebrated Halloween, so I feel it's necessary to share his costume:
ROAR!
...and maybe a pumpkin sighting or two:
If you've read this far, then thanks for your time and interest! I hope to share more fun moments with you, sooner than later. The holidays are upon us (well that's what the aisles at Target say, anyhow) so you are guaranteed some photos at the very least! I will try my best to avoid dressing Leo like a little turkey, pilgrim, elf or Santa.
You know how you always HEAR about sleepless nights... but it doesn't really register until it happens to you? Learning to function on much less sleep was the theme of the month. Either that, or poopy diapers.
Leo is an awesome little fellow. He's changed so much just within this short period. He's starting to make new sounds like "Coo" and "AHH!" - not just piercing cries anymore. I'm pretty sure he recognizes me as someone special by now. I think I have a unique Mommy-Aura or something.
His most favorite time would have to be either while feeding - or getting his butt washed with warm water. His least favorite time seems to be when he's naked and about to get a new diaper or outfit put on him. Those last few seconds of nakedness makes him flail and whine like no other. He's also no picnic when he's gassy. I now get super excited when he burps, because that means less fussiness.
More slightly stressful stuff: "Cradle Cap." Look it up. It's gross. Not that bad on Leo yet, but he's showing signs of it. Also, newborn rash. It's basically like little tiny baby pimples on his cheeks - they come and go. Sometimes I feel like I should do something about it - but every nurse and family member and book and blog says that it's natural, and will go away in a few months. I'm also always paranoid that I'm not producing enough milk to keep him happy and healthy - so we've been supplementing with formula once or twice a day. Kinda bums me out, but he is such a big boy and he's growing SO fast!! Kind of a Catch 22, because in order to MAKE more milk, I should be putting him to breast more often. But he can't just wait for more milk to come in the meantime, he needs it now. So formula is helping. But the less he feeds from Mommy, the less milk I make! Gosh darn it. Can't catch a break.
Aside from all the normal stuff that stresses Mommy out - most the time I'm pretty much in LOVE with motherhood. I still can't believe it's been a month. And although I've been told to cherish this time when he's tiny... I'm so looking forward to him growing up: learning to talk, walk, and all that jazz. At least hold his own head up. Then I can be a lot less paranoid all the time.
Here is a list of things that have helped me cope/thrive over the past few weeks:
- My parents... or Leo's grandparents!! They have been truly supportive. The three of us have been finding a certain balance when things get to be a little too intense, there is always someone there to lend a helping hand.
- "Wetness Indicator" diapers. Genius, really. A little yellow stripe on the outside of the diaper that magically turns blue when wet inside.
- The Diaper Genie. I really wasn't sure about this contraption - but after changing about 10+ dirty diapers on a daily basis, it really does come in handy. Sure, we might survive on a normal trash bin if we took the trash out 3 times a day. With the genie, we only have to take out the dirty loads every few days - and no yucky smell!
- Onesies with zippers. The ones with snaps can really drive you crazy when there are flailing baby-limbs involved. Zippers are fast and efficient - and so much easier in the middle of the night during half-asleep diaper changes.
- Baby washcloths. Yep, specifically made for babies. They're softer! We have a small pile of them that we go through so quickly. They're great for safeguarding against Leo's "pee-fountain" moments. They're great for baths, obviously. Also for keeping his eyes and face clean throughout the day. He's an eye-booger machine!
- Costco's generic "Kirkland" brand baby wipes. We started out with Huggies - but Leo's little tushie got so irritated and red! We promptly switched to rinsing off his butt with water EVERY time - and when we realized that wipes could do the job during pee-only diapers... this brand saved us! Very soft and gentle, which keeps both baby and mommy happier.
- Halo Swaddles. Sure, I learned how to wrap a swaddle in birthing class. It's a lot tougher with an actual baby. I have been able to successfully swaddle Leo a handful of instances - and the rest of the time, I just fake it and make sure he looks like a burrito. Halo Swaddles are AWESOME, though! They zip up, and have velcro snaps. Total no-brainer when it comes to comforting the little one.
- My water bottle. Since I'm breastfeeding, I really had to get serious about hydrating myself throughout the day. I'm thirsty ALL the time. And I want to snack ALL the time. So the water helps curb the snackage... but when I really need something, I'll reach for a granola bar or a banana. Yum.
Well that's it for now... I know a lot of my posts lately have been in list format - but I have a lot less time to get creative with the whole speak-your-mind dealio. I hope this is somehow a little bit interesting to someone out there. If anything - it is still therapeutic for me to get things off my own mind. So there!
Looking forward to my two-month post! Stay tuned :-)
Alright, folks. This is a REALLY long entry. But I thought that I should at the very least finish the pregnancy chapter of my blog with how it all went down... plus add a good, solid announcement:
Leo Jett was born at 10:46 a.m. on Wednesday, April 18, 2012!
Weight: 9 lbs. 1 oz.
Length: 21.75 inches
Awesomeness: off the charts!
I'll recap the events leading up to Leo's birth in list format. It'll help me with the timeline, which is kind of blurry now - but I'll do my best to include all the good stuff.
TUESDAY APRIL 17(all times are approximate)
Before the hospital
+ Contractions throughout the day
+ Cousin Al arrives around 3pm, and we begin timing contractions with his fancy iPad app
+ Pains feel like someone wringing my neck, only inside my belly. Oh joy.
+ 7:00pm Contractions are averaging about 1 minute long, and 5 minutes apart... and getting even closer by the minute
+ 7:30pm Time to go! But wait... where's the camera? Dad's just GOTTA take a picture. Can we go now?!!
Arrival at hospital
+ 8:00pm Arrive at hospital. Check in. Pains feel like they're about 3 minutes apart now.
+ 8:30pm Labor & Delivery floor. I'm assigned a room. It's Cousin Al and my mom with me in the room. Dad's in the waiting room. A couple nurses are in and out. They need to check & see if I'm ready to be admitted. Pains are SO close together now. Maybe 2 minutes, if that.
+ 9:00pm YIKES. Water breaks while I'm lying in hospital bed. Guess I'm officially admitted now! Feels crazy, like a water balloon bursting - ummm - INSIDE you. Yeah, that happened. I remember yelling out at the top of my lungs "MY WATER BROKE." Just call me Captain Obvious.
+Nurse checks me: I am 5 centimeters dilated. 24 hours ago I was only 1 cm!
+ 9:30pm to 11:30pm SERIOUS labor pains for two hours straight. No drugs yet... I really want to go for a natural childbirth. Pains are about 1 minute apart. Nonstop. Each contraction feels like my body wants to split in half. The worst pain I have ever felt in my whole 32 years of life.
+ I recall mostly just moaning, and saying "Owwww" a lot. I think I may have even shouted out "SHIT!" and threatened an F-bomb or two... but yeah, mostly moaning.
+ I snapped at Cousin Al. And he was being a really good cheerleader. I was just in so much pain, and that's all I could focus on. My brain wouldn't leave to an elevated magical place where nothing hurt. He kept trying to say encouraging things, like "There's going to be a baby at the end of this! You're going to have a little boy when this is all over with." And all I could say was "Al, I love ya, but please be quiet." Pretty sure that's the most severe thing I've ever said to Al. I remember my mom giggling at him after I told him to shush.
+ 11:45pm After lots of convincing from nurses and family, I decide I cannot handle this sort of pain any longer. Time for an epidural.
WEDNESDAY APRIL 18
Epidural
+ 12:00am Oh GOD. I keep picturing in my mind how massive the needle is. I'm sitting on the edge of the bed curled up and over like a shrimp, eyes shut tight. Nurse is holding me up, and my feet are planted firmly on a chair by the bed. Anesthesiologist is behind me on the other side of the bed, and opens up his epidural "kit." They asked everyone to leave. A quick biting STING, I wince, and think... that wasn't that bad. Oh but wait, that sting was only the numbing medicine so I didn't feel the actual catheter go in. OH MY GOD is all I can think. It feels like a little ice-cold thread, worming it's way through my spine. He tries once. No good. He tries again, can't seem to find the perfect spot. He now says he has to open a WHOLE NEW epidural kit and start over. I want to call it quits, but I'm too exhausted to say a word. I am bent over like a pretzel, my hair a sweaty mess... in my face, everywhere. He finally gets it right. I vaguely recall him saying there was something strange going on with my spine, making it hard for him to get in appropriately. I don't care anymore. I just wanna lie down and fall into a deep sleep.
+ 12:20am Bliss. Absolute bliss. I feel nothing. I stare at the monitor. All these contractions going on without me feeling a THING. Oh, there's aching for sure, but nothing mind-splitting. I fall in and out of sleep throughout the next several hours.
Am I Ten Centimeters Yet? No? How about now?
+ 12:30am to 7:30am Another waiting game? Okay, we can do this. I've waited throughout pregnancy. What's another 7 hours? Nurses and Doctors are in and out throughout the night, kinda like my sleep patterns. Every couple hours they check if my cervix has dilated adequately or not. Felt like I was at 8 centimeters for a few hours. Then by the time 7am rolls around I am very very close to 10!
+ I've got a LOT of weird cables and wires and IV thingamabobs connected to me. 2 belts wrapped around my tummy: One for Leo's heartrate, one for my contractions. There's the IV to keep me hydrated. I am also hooked up to antibiotics because I'm GBS positive. Don't forget the magical epidural stuff going into my back. I've got a catheter down there, since I can't very well get up to pee. They also inserted a little monitor that attaches itself to Leo's scalp through my stretching cervix. And another one inserted into the uterus, right next to his head, to keep track of my contractions, since the belts were confused by all the amniotic fluid (I can't believe I still had a lot of fluid after my water breaking the way it did) - and they couldn't get accurate readings. So yes... wires in my arm, my back, between my legs - the whole shebang.
+ Somewhere in the middle of my contractions (which I still can't feel at this point) Leo's heart rate went way down. Low enough for Doctors to be concerned. His head was reeeeally lowered and a part of it that was pushing against his skull was stressing him out every time my uterus tried to push him out. Even though his placement seems ready to go, he's rotated at a somewhat strange angle. So now Doctors are wondering if they should let me get to the full 10 cm, hope that he turns the right way, and push - or if I should just opt for a C-Section.
+ My water broke so long ago that now I've developed a fever. Some sort of infection of the uterus, since I'd been ruptured for so long. So they hooked up yet another bag of antibiotics to fight that off.
Pushing
+ 8:00am Okay, fully dilated at 10cm and the doctors give me the
go-ahead to push. Seems that Leo has decided to turn the right way, and
we're ready to rock.
+ There are five people in the room with me
as I'm getting amped to push. Cousin Al, Mama J, Cousin Jen on the right
of me. One nurse at the helm, and a student nurse to my left. My dad is
waiting outside.
+ Nurse explains how to push. Basically, use the same muscles you'd use to poop. I remember being VERY concerned that I was going to poop in front of everyone, and she said it doesn't happen as often as I'd think. I think she's lying to make me feel better!
+ Here we go. My feet are being held up on either side by nurse and cousin. I am grasping at my knees and pulling my legs with my hands, towards my chest. I feel like a toad or turtle that's been toppled upside down and can't get back up. We all count to ten together, and I basically imagine myself popping the baby out like one of those strange ladies in Thailand who are famous for shooting ping-pong balls out of their vaginas. Yeah, that exists. I don't even want to know how I know that. Hopefully it was some casual dialogue from a B-movie that I can't recall the name of right now.
+ Well, seems that I'm pushing "with my face." All the stress and fear and strength and anxiety has all traveled to my wincing, squished-up face. Like I just sucked on a lemon or something. I'm told that I have to not push with my face, and focus everything downward. THINK POOP!!! Ewww.
+ 9:30am Okay, we've been pushing for an hour. NOTHING. I feel like I'm failing. What am I doing wrong? Doctor comes in and helps for one round of pushing, then inspects the situation. He tells us the baby hasn't moved, and what we think is his head trying to come out is actually a very swollen part of his scalp, and it could stress the baby out. But the baby looks fine according to his heart rate - and Doc gives us 30 minutes to keep trying. Talk about pressure, in every sense of the word.
+ 10:00am Bummer. Thirty more minutes of pushing, and nothing. I am so frustrated and sad that I can't pull this off. I am crying because I am tired as hell, and disappointed, too. I am scared that now they have to slice me open with a C-section and I could literally DIE. And I don't use the phrase "literally die" lightly. Anesthesiologist comes into the room with a little alchohol wipe. He places it to my cheek and asks me what it feels like. "Wet and cold" I respond. Then he puts it somewhere below my belly button and asks "How about here?" and I feel nothing at all. Guess that continuous flow of epidural is really working. He tries a few more spots, and I answer accordingly. He says looks like we're good to go. I am shaved by a nurse. I think I receive yet another shot of something in my left shoulder.
C-Section
+ 10:15am Okay, this is actually happening. I am being rolled off to the operating room to get sliced & diced like some sad female victim in a horror movie. I am shivering. Is that the drugs or the fear?
+ 10:20am I feel like I'm in a very intense episode of Grey's Anatomy or E.R. The operating room is SO bright, with a million florescent lights hovering above. It is a sea of white lights, metal tools, and blue scrubs. It sounds like there are at least 20 people in the room. Can that be right? Is this a party? Do we need all these people?
+ I shut my eyes as they move me from my bed to the operating table. They set up a blue curtain, blocking my view from the pending massacre on the other side. They spread my arms out into a T and buckle me down like I'm in a mental institution.
+ Anesthesiologist injects even MORE numbing juice into my left shoulder. I'll take it. I don't want to feel ANYTHING, por favor. I am shivering like CRAZY now. Okay, it's definitely the drugs. I am freaking out in my head, but not crying. I am picturing the worst-possible scenarios, involving CHAINSAWS. Lovely.
+ My mom is now sitting next to my head, dressed in scrubs and a showercap. Seconds later, I feel pressure below my belly button.
+ It feels like someone is using my belly as a punching bag. It's not painful... definitely not a stinging pain, kinda like if a bully is shoving and pushing you around, but never quite socking you in the face like you'd expect him to.
+ The punching bag action grows more and more intense. I am freaking out, so I decide to sing quietly. No seriously, I'm singing now. Don't try to stop me. I don't want to hear or see or imagine ANY OF THIS. I will start screaming if I don't focus on something else. So I squeeze my mom's hand, and softly start singing this cheesy old song that the both of us used to sing on road trips when I was a kid:
+ Anesthesiologist asks me if I'm okay. I reply "Yeah, just singing."
+ 10:46am Suddenly the pressure down below stops, and it feels like a weight is being lifted out of me. Like, imagine you've been carrying a backpack full of heavy rocks and climbing stairs for several months - then someone is like, "Hey - you should probably take that backpack off." So you do. And that's that. The weight is gone, like magic. My baby is born.
+ I don't hear crying for a good 30 seconds or so. But when his wailing starts, I start crying myself, my mom goes to take pictures, and then something hits me like a ton of bricks: OUCHHHHH more pain. What the hell are they doing down there? (I realize now that they were removing the placenta, then probably arranging my intestines back into place. And stitching and stapling me back together. Ewww.) I just want to see my baby. But it hurts so bad I have to shut my eyes and scream out PLEASE STOP THAT HURTS THAT HURTS. Anesthesiologist asks me if I want something to knock me out. YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD MAKE IT STOP.
Recovery Room
+ I have no idea what time it is when I wake up, but I do know that as soon as I am alert I puke about 3 times all over myself. Apparently, some people vomit when they wake up from anesthesia. I also am talking in really low and quick spurts, like I'm possessed by Tarzan. Quick phrases like "Stomach hurts. Stomach hurts."
+ I couldn't even focus on seeing my baby yet because I was so disoriented from coming out of my deep drug-induced sleep.
+ Finally the morphine comes, and a nurse is cleaning up the vomit around my head. Okay. Feeling slightly human again. Can I see my baby now?
+ They plop Leo on my chest and he IMMEDIATELY latches onto my breast. WHOA, tiger. You are awesome. I love you. I can only see half of your face, but you are a human being that just came out of my body. I'm still kind of blurry from the drugs, but you are amazing and there is no denying that.
+ I ask one of the nurses to hold him up in front of me so we can be properly introduced, face to face. I love him so much, I start weeping. Stupid hormones.
+ Family has come and gone, and my baby is being sent off to NICU to start his own antibiotics (because of the infection I got from being ruptured too long). I am alone with a nurse who is helping to clean me and give me more drugs to ease the pain.
+ I am rolled away to my postpartum room.
Healing
+ I am told I can't get out of bed for 12 hours. I want to see Leo so badly, but I know if I barely even try to roll over right now, it will be agony. So I sleep a lot, while receiving more fluids and antiobiotics via IV drip.
+ Day 2 of healing: Nurse wakes me up at 4am and we try walking to the door and back. It takes me about 5 minutes when it should only take 30 seconds... but hey, progress!!
+ Throughout the day I walk a few more times. My nurse forces me to. Tough love. But I MUST see my baby!! I am able to walk all the way to the NICU by 5pm or so. *cue cheesy "Reunited" love song from the 80's*
+ My next few days at the hospital are all about healing and seeing Leo. Interchanging between the two. Clumsily perfecting the art of breastfeeding and changing diapers.
Leo in NICU
Baby Blues
+ Well, my time is up at the hospital, and they're sending me home 4 days after giving birth. Leo has to stay in NICU for a full week, though. I am SUPER emotional / hormonal. I feel SO sad that I'm going home without him, and think about all the hours I put into getting him used to breastmilk & latching on... and now that I'm going home, they're going to be feeding with him with formula all over again. I worry that he'll forget the way I smell... or forget how to latch on appropriately. I am weepy and pathetic all night long. This postpartum depression continues for a few more days. EVERYTHING makes me want to cry. I feel like I'm not in control of my emotions, like I'm losing my mind. I do get to visit him at the hospital, and even try staying in NICU overnight. It helps :)
Bringing Baby Home
+ FINALLY, a week after Leo is born, I get to bring him home! Finally, his antibiotics are all done, his circumcision is healing well, and I only had one question: Could I take the docs & nurses home with me? Eek!
Regarding this blog...
I think I'll eventually start blogging again, probably about figuring out this whole mommy-hood thing out. Being pregnant was pretty amazing, if not confusing and painful - and keeping up with the blog helped me stay sane. Now that I get to hold little Leo in my arms, I can honestly say it has been more than rewarding - and I look forward to sharing more stories soon. Expect less insomnia, and more poop-related shenanigans. Oh joy!
7:00am ~ This morning, I woke up feeling a little different. I was more achy than usual, and it was significantly harder to roll out of bed. It wasn't a serious contraction, just some mild pains. Normally, I have breakfast, then linger in my grogginess a while before I hop in the shower. But today I just really felt like a shower is what my day needed to start off with. I still felt weird and heavy after breakfast later on, so I figured maybe it was gas or something. Here's where it gets a little TMI, so read on with caution.
------------ don't say I didn't warn you -----------
10:00am ~ After sitting a spell in the bathroom, and other details that you probably don't want to read about, I basically lost my "mucus plug."
What in the heck is a mucus plug, you ask? Well... it's as icky as it sounds:
"Throughout pregnancy, a mucus plug blocks the opening of the cervix to
prevent bacteria from entering the uterus. Before labor, this mucus plug
is expelled allowing the baby to pass through the cervix during labor and
birth." [source]
So anyway... yep. Bye-bye, mucus plug! And hello... bleeding? That's not normal, is it? I've read that blood can definitely accompany the release of the plug, but the bleeding continued for a few more hours. It was maxi-pad time, which I was NOT expecting during labor. None of the books say that you're supposed to bleed a bunch before your labor begins. I wasn't having serious contractions at all yet, but the blood was really freaking me out.
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2:00pm ~ It's better to be safe than sorry, right? Even though you're not supposed to go to the hospital until the pain is consistently unbearable, the bleeding seemed reason enough at the time to get a move on. So off we went: my parents, cousin Al, and preggo. It was a relaxed drive, and we secretly hoped that I was one of those lucky few women that hardly felt any pain during their contractions, and maybe I was already dilated, and this was it!! But I can be a cynical lady sometimes, so I also prepared myself to possibly get sent back home.
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2:45pm ~ Okay. All checked in... up on the 4th floor of Labor & Delivery. A nurse escorted me to a hospital room, then into the bathroom, and asked to see my pad to check the blood (Ewww) and she said it looked totally normal. They ask me to wear one of those funky paper-thin gowns and lie down. I ask her how long the bleeding was supposed to last, and she said that I'll continue to bleed through labor all the way until delivery, now that my cervix was unplugged. Seriously? This NEVER came up in birthing class or in books. I've only heard of lots of bleeding AFTER the baby is born. I would have probably stayed home if this blood situation sounded remotely familiar at all. I felt lame.
But here I was, so they decided to check me out anyway. They strapped 2 belts around my tummy: one for listening to & monitoring Leo's heartbeat & movements... the other for keeping track of my contractions. I got so used to the mild "tensing up" that when she asked me, "Did you feel that last one?" I just looked up at her and said, "Huh? Right now? Not really. Wait. That was an actual contraction?!" I looked at the monitor and sure enough, the little line had just spiked up. I guess I'd been holding out for the "motherload" of contractions, that I started to dismiss the little pains all together. Whoops. But I was definitely paying attention to them now.
One thing that stood out was how often the doctor and nurses commented on how much amniotic fluid was surrounding the baby. "Wow that's a big belly. Oh! So much fluid! Fluid this, fluid that! Look at all that fluid! I can't feel the baby from the outside because there's SO MUCH FLUID!" It was actually a relief. For a while there I was worried I was gonna give birth to the Incredible Hulk. But again, "it's just a whole lotta fluid." They told me that when my water breaks, there will be NO question at all.
The doctor checked my cervix, by the way. Guess how much I was dilated at that point? LESS than 1 centimeter. That's hardly anything at all. She didn't even want to call it a full centimeter - and instead classified it as a "fingertip."
Hmph. Long way to go until we get to magic number 10. Oh well. I kept telling myself that at least I know the bleeding is totally normal, and now I have a better idea of how much farther I have to go.
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4:30pm ~ Back home, slightly defeated... but armed with a bit of knowledge. Also... REALLY noticing the pains that accompany the tensing up now. Maybe I needed that visit to the hospital to remind me that every little pain is important, and to really pay more attention to what those pains mean.
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6:00pm ~ Dinner was yummy. Cousin Al and friend Rossel are now hanging out with me, and we take a VERY short walk. But to me, it feels like the longest walk in all of history. Walking is painful. Yuck.
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7:30pm through midnight (aka right now as I type this) ~ Okay, now I'm feeling contractions consistently. But they're not unbearable. I can talk through them, and I don't really feel the pain in my lower back the way that everyone describes it. But the pains that I do feel really suck, nonetheless. They last about one minute each, and the gaps between the pains range from 7 minutes to 20 minutes. Nothing truly consistent except the length of the contraction.
So now I'm supposed to try and sleep?! That'll be tough, now that my brain is so aware of timing and feeling and hurting and bleeding. If these contractions last throughout the night, and get progressively worse, I'm guessing that tomorrow (4/17) will be the big day. But who knows?
Leo is running his own schedule right now, and I'm just along for the ride.
Well, so much for punctuality! Any bets as to when this is actually going to happen? How about a photo to help aid you in your guess?
Here's what a full 40 weeks of pregnancy looks like on me:
Leo has definitely dropped in the last few days. I'm feeling weird electric-shock-zaps in nerves I never knew I had. Such different sensations going on down there. And I've been on the elliptical again tonight to help him along (that's what commercial breaks are for these days, right?) Not much else to report, though. Some tensing up as per usual, getting out of bed or off the couch has become a ten-step process, lots of tossing and turning at night.
Slightly bummed, but I just gotta remind myself that the big day should be around the corner.
Tonight's the night before Leo's approximated due date. And yep, here I sit, typing, and still quite pregnant.
Had an appointment with the Doc this morning. I asked her if she would check if I was dilated yet, and she said it wouldn't make a difference at this point because I unfortunately haven't had major contractions yet, and that's what basically starts the dilation. Color me frustrated. I let her know that my Braxton Hicks "practice" contractions have been going crazy, hardening and tensing up often throughout the day. Doc says this is a very good sign, & reminded me that it's my body really trying to get ready for the baby. But they're not REAL contractions yet! (General rule: don't go to the hospital until you can't walk or talk through your contractions and they are less than 5 minutes apart, regularly. Unless your
water has broken, you've noticed bleeding or there is a decrease in your
baby's movement.)
She did comment on how much bigger my belly has grown over the past couple weeks (As if I didn't already know from all the bug-eyed "Wow's" everyone's been giving me!) At first she was worried that the baby might be getting too big, just from the look of it. But after listening to Leo's heartbeat, smushing my tummy around, then reviewing my most recent ultrasound (March 12th - when Leo measured just over 6 lbs), Doc re-measured my belly, and said that most of the heft from my tummy is probably amniotic fluid, and NOT an oversized Andre-the-Giant baby.
The norm at this point is usually around 5 to 15 cc's of fluid surrounding Leo, and I've got a whopping 21 cc's. I asked if this was a bad thing, and Doc told me it was nothing to worry about. (Of course I had to Google "high amniotic fluid level" and came up with a whole lot of scary scenarios. DARN you, internet, for making me so uber-paranoid.) But if Dr. P says I'm okay, then I'll take it.
Doc also says that if I don't go into labor before next Friday (4/20), she's thinking of inducing me that weekend. She also scheduled me for a final ultrasound on the 18th, just to double-check all is well before making a decision like inducing my labor. I can't believe I may have to wait another week. I'm still holding out for THIS weekend. PLEASE, jeebus. Let it be sooner.
She highly recommends to "Walk, walk, WALK!!" to get this baby out asap. I asked her if using our elliptical was okay and she replied, "Yes, PLEASE do that." So my cousins Donna and Al took turns with me throughout this morning on the elliptical machine for about 10 minutes at a time. After three rounds, and numerous bathroom trips, I could REALLY feel (and see!) a difference. Could it work that quickly? My belly is hanging lower than ever right now (it's about 9:30pm) - and I'm definitely ACHING between my legs more than ever.
SO. Much. Pressure!
I think I'll try more cardio tonight, but my legs are pretty mad at me for the sudden spike in activity. Small price to pay I guess for prompt face-to-face time with my baby.
To close, Happy Baby's Eve, maybe! Maybe not. Either way, I'll be here... as round and frustrated as ever.
That is what goes through my head as soon as I wake up. I'm sure it has a lot to do with this being the very last week before my due date. But aside from the anxiety that comes with waiting for such a monumental occasion - EVERY single position I find myself sitting, lying, or standing in is only comfortable for about 10 minutes or so. It feels like I'm trying to balance a few bowling balls at a time. I feel soooo weighed down by all this baby-ness. Walking (or trudging) around is supremely uncomfortable now (again, forget all my complaining from before... this discomfort is stealing the show), though I still try and do squats while I'm standing for some sort of exercise/preparation for the big day. Which is THREE DAYS from now.
I think that knowing my due date is only setting me up for disappointment. April 14th is stamped across my brain in big blinking neon lights. They say that for first-time moms, the baby usually arrives a week late. I'm hoping that Leo is a stickler for punctuality. I'm gonna wake up on Saturday morning, with Leo knocking on my tummy from the inside, signaling his arrival. I'm not even going to consider him being tardy. I'm just gonna put it out into the universe that Yes, Indeedy - Saturday is D-Day.
Throughout this last week, I've been trying to find ways to feel normal. Yesterday, I went with Mama J (That's what my mom shall be called from now on) to get our nails done. It made me feel almost human again. Having your toenails painted in Ferrari Red can really add some extra oomph & sass to your day. Last night, I went out for dinner with Cousin Al for Mac & Cheese night at a local restaurant. Delish - and felt like I was part of the human race for a moment! Also, I finally started reading the Hunger Games so that my brain could try & focus on something other than this weekend. That Katniss gal is so kick-ass. I keep imagining Christina Aguilera's hit song "Fighter" playing in the background every time she's on the run or kicking butt. Maybe I should put that song on a playlist for when I'm in labor. But if Leo hears that stuff on his way out, he might come out armed with a bow & arrow... and not in the cute cupid sort of way.
I'm not even sure what I'll want to listen to while in labor. Apparently that's something that a lot of moms are doing in the delivery room these days. It helps kill time between contractions, and helps mom focus DURING them. Part of me wants to get all Baby Einstein on Leo, and play nothing but classical music & lullabies. But if the music is mainly to help ME focus, then I may have to put a little more thought into it.
Any suggestions? Hope to hear from some of you readers. I've been hearing from several folks that they actually do follow along with my crazy blogging, but I have yet to see real evidence of this! ;)
I had a dream last night that a large, round, blue, cartoonish, ball-shaped bug was shrieking and wailing and chasing me around. It attached to my leg at one point, and when I tried to pull it off, I was horrified to see it left traces of gooey stringy ooze everywhere. Then, for whatever reason, I had to walk to a liquor store, and the only way to get into the parking lot was to climb over a large stone wall. Even with my pregnant belly, I was awesome and hopped over with ease. But you know when you're a little kid and you're climbing a staircase, and you get this creepy feeling that a ghost is chasing after you, so you run as fast as you can up the stairs before said ghost grabs your ankles?! That was the main feeling during the dream... I woke up, a sweaty mess. Analyze THAT.
#2 ELLIPTICAL MACHINE
I rediscovered our elliptical machine that's been hiding behind a chair, collecting dust in our family room. I dig it. It's really easy on my knees, and surprisingly feels easier than walking. I think my mom is slightly paranoid about me using it - but I'm okay, mom!! It should definitely help Leo with the whole gravity situation.
#3 ROB SCHNEIDER
I
read somewhere recently that Rob Schneider is half Filipino and half
German. I don't know if that's accurate or not, but I've been thinking
about it. Little Leo will also be the same two mixes of race... so now I
have these horrible images of giving birth to Deuce Bigelow: Male
Gigolo. YIKES.
Well, I haven't posted in a few days. That's because there isn't much to report! The waiting game, as I've said before, is not very exciting.
Since Leo is bigger now, he has a lot less room to move the way he did a few weeks ago. I still feel him squirm and pivot often, but no major kicking anymore. Sometimes he sticks his butt out really far and my stomach looks all weird and angular and contorted. Freaky deaky. No major contractions yet, either. Just a lot of tensing up, without major pain.
Most of my complaints these days are due to two main things: general all-around discomfort from the weight of my tummy, and a bit of "cabin fever" from not driving and being indoors a lot.
Walking has been the number one recommendation from everyone & their mom's doctor's cousin's sister-in-law. But I've been walking around the house more than anywhere else. I have this fear that my water could break at the park while I'm picking up dog poop, or something crazy like that. That's the other reason why I'm scared to drive by myself these days. So I've been a homebody for sure. I do get out and hang with family... we go to restaurants or window shop every now & then, but I just feel so... BLAHHHHH lately.
See? I told you. TOTALLY boring. This was probably not even worth a blog entry... but I thought I'd share my 39-week photo with y'all, at least:
I guess the good news is that I'm not gonna be pregnant forever. At the most... 2 more weeks. I hope a lot less, though!
I've been skimming different blogs and sites for ways to get the labor going sooner than later. I'm sure most of them are just old wives' tales. A lot of people will tell you that the baby will come when he's ready, and you can't force it.
Buuuuuut... I can't help but be intrigued about a few of these (and baffled by a number of them, too):
drinking red raspberry leaf tea
eating very spicy foods
jumping on a trampoline
walking
jogging
dancing
sex
squatting
climbing stairs
eating lots of pineapple
jumping jacks
castor oil with orange juice
listening to newborn babies cry
bouncing on an exercise ball
prenatal massage
using an inversion table
hot baths
evening primrose oil pills
acupuncture or acupressure
nipple stimulation
I think I can handle walking, dancing, squatting, drinking the raspberry tea, eating pineapple, and climbing stairs. I know none of these are surefire ways of luring Leo into the world, but being more active and adding a specific fruit to my diet doesn't sound too crazy, right?
Have you seen that little countdown thing on the right side of my blog over there? --->
There are 10 DAYS left before my original due date. TEN DAYS!! Or if you wanna go by what the last ultrasound tech told me... FIVE DAYS until D-day. I guess I can hold out a little longer before going too nuts.
Sometimes the internet can have TOO much information, you know what I mean? Certain keyword searches can make a mama-to-be really paranoid. I think I'll step away from the computer today... and step outside with the doggie instead.
I know I said I wouldn't write a blog every single time I have a major pain, but each time I have one it's stronger, and vastly different from the last time, so I really want to take note of it. There's just a LOT of time between each pain (like DAYS), so I know it's not real labor yet. Boo. I hear the ideal time to go to the hospital is when the pain lasts for about one minute, with 5 minutes between each pain, consistently over a 1-hour period.
Anyway, my bladder so thoughtfully and routinely wakes me up every night, between 3-4am. But last night was a little different: As I woke up at around 3:15, the urge to pee was replaced by a really REALLY intense and painful tightening. And not just on my left side like last time, it was all over my abdomen. I could feel it from my ribs all the way down past my belly button. I shifted around because that usually helps, but the pain sort of kept me in the same position - almost like I was frozen in place. And it sucked, big time. It hurt for about 30 seconds total, which makes me sound like a wimp - but it really did hurt. Promise.
Half of me was like "THAT SUCKED, where is the return policy on this thing?" and the other half of me was so excited and anxious that I sat up in bed to await the next round. I guess I sat up way too quickly, because that sudden movement reminded me that my uterus was really hard, and there was still a little bit of residual cramping from a couple moments before. But I had to pee! So I got up and waddled to the bathroom to do my thing, all the while still cramping a bit. By the time I washed up and got back in bed, all the pain was gone.
I grabbed my cell phone and turned on my little handy dandy "Contraction App" just in case it started again, but eventually fell asleep... at around 5:30 am! For those not paying close attention, that means I was tossing and turning for over 2 hours before knocking out. I hate not being able to sleep. I feel like I'm balancing a pumpkin on top of my tummy, and whichever side I choose to sleep on makes me feel REALLY weird and crooked and unbalanced. In retrospect, I think I spent about 5 minutes on each side... left, back, right, back again... repeat.
Anyhow, YAY for progress! BOO for pain. YAY for almost getting to meet Leo! But BOO to the waiting game, etc. etc.
To close, here's a fun little tidbit from babycenter.com about how Leo is doing this week:
"Your baby has really plumped up. He weighs about 6.8 pounds and he's over 19 1/2 inches long (like a leek).
He has a firm grasp, which you'll soon be able to test when you hold
his hand for the first time! His organs have matured and are ready for
life outside the womb.
Wondering what color your baby's eyes will
be? You may not be able to tell right away. If he's born with brown
eyes, they'll likely stay brown. If he's born with steel gray or dark
blue eyes, they may stay gray or blue or turn green, hazel, or brown by
the time he's 9 months old. That's because a child's irises (the
colored part of the eye) may gain more pigment in the months after he's
born, but they usually won't get "lighter" or more blue. (Green, hazel,
and brown eyes have more pigment than gray or blue eyes.)"
Just switch that "6.8 pounds" they mentioned to
something more around 7.5 pounds... IF I'm doing the math correctly.
Yeahhhh, let's hope I'm as bad at math as I recall.
Yeah, that's not a pillow. That is FOR REAL, folks. I wonder how much more stretch this particular shirt has left. Possibly about to bust out of it, hulk style:
Well, these last few weeks are really going to test my patience. The waiting game isn't very fun. Yes, I'm anxious and excited in a good way... of course, of course - but the impatience is killer!!
Sigh. I will try my very best to enjoy these last moments of waddling and aching and not fitting in clothes and more aching and supposed "glow."
In other news, I totally won a contest for little Leo! Comment below, and help me choose one of the following hand-knit sweater designs from customknitsforbaby.com:
In OTHER-other news, Leo is supposedly the size of a watermelon now. Yep, I believe it:
So close, yet so far. Wasn't that a Hall & Oates song or something?
(This may or may not be a bit TMI for some readers. Just putting it out there.)
Last week, my doc "swabbed" me for a routine GBS screening. This is apparently a normal test for a preggo between 35-37 weeks. The test isn't done until late in the pregnancy because it can come and go. GBS stands for Group B Streptococcus. It's a bacteria commonly found in the human body of about 30-45% of healthy women, and it usually does not cause any symptoms. My doctor casually compared it to acne: some people get it, some people don't. Completely different from strep throat, which is Group A, I guess. It's not sexually transmitted. It's just something that some chicks develop, others won't.
I was told NOT to worry about it. Totally not a concern for an adult (men can have it, too) but - if a preggo plans on having a vaginal delivery, GBS can be transferred to the newborn, and there's a 1 in 300 chance that it could develop into something WAY more serious, like pneumonia or something scary like that.
So I got the results and tested positive.
I was really worried - because pretty much every other part of this pregnancy has been worry-free; every visit has been a bloomin' success. Even though Doc told me this is totally normal, it still SOUNDS bad, doesn't it?
Anyway - this is what's supposed to happen: When I go into labor, they'll ask me what my GBS status is, and I'll tell them it's positive. That's when they give me antibiotics (most likely Penicillin) through an IV. And that's it. There's no point in doing it now, it's better if they give it to me while I'm in actual labor.
After the penicillin, chances of the baby getting sick are severely stunted... something like 1 in 6,000 instead.
It still gives me the jitters.
Also - a small part of me wants to try for a natural birth, aka no drugs at all, but if I'm hooked up to an IV, I can't walk around as easily to help the pain during contractions. Just more stuff to think about. As though my brain isn't full of enough worries already.
Ay, chihuahua.
Since this GBS thing is so common - did any of the moms that are reading this blog test postive for it, too?
I was lying in bed last night, watching a chick flick, and this searing pain shot through my left side. Usually if I get an ache, I just roll over or switch positions, and it goes away. But this one lingered for about 20 seconds. When the pain went away, I stood up to wait for another round... but I guess that was all she wrote. My tummy stayed pretty hard for a while though... but no more pain throughout the night.
I don't think I'll post a blog every single time I get a pain spasm, but this particular one was much stronger than anything I've felt before. All I could do was quietly say, "Ow. Ouch. Ow, ow owww." I was more interested in analyzing it than freaking out about it.
I guess my body is preparing for the big day. What a TEASE!
In my own mind, it might be worth mentioning that upon staring at my huge naked tummy in the mirror this morning, I noticed a wealth of ugly veiny stretch marks on the underside of my curved belly. Don't believe it's that gross? Than try googling the phrase "Pregnancy Stretch Marks."
Ewwwwww.
Sad pouty mama time. It's so not cute :-(
I used to wrinkle my nose at some of the birthing videos I've watched. Some tummies look REALLY icky just before birth... like horror-movie special effects veins. I know what it LOOKS like shouldn't matter, but I'm still a girly chick and I hope these marks go away with time.
Lastly, I keep getting that feeling like the baby's going to fall out when I'm in the middle of a walk. And sometimes even just lying down. The pressure down there is increasing, and it's the weirdest feeling. It's like, dude... Leo... if you wanna come out, please gimme a warning sign so I can mentally prepare myself. Do NOT fall out, you hear me mister?!!
As was stated in my very first blog entry, "This is so not ideal," - but I am surprisingly feeling more complete than ever, like for the first time I have a "True North" to start heading towards. I'm a creative-head, always wanting to experience life through bringing something new into this world - but with that attitude can come a go-with-the-flow-but-never-truly-finish-anything mindset. Some people look at this as what comes with the territory of being an artist. Some look at this as being cowardly and not wanting to "grow up." I always seem to follow the heart, instead of the mind. I think people who "have it made" are the people who can find balance between both worlds. Analytical and Emotional. Left and Right Brain. Working in synchronicity.
I am working on this. Every day.
To some of you, it might seem like I have my shit together. The truth of the matter is that I am REALLY REALLY TRULY scared of what kind of mom I am going to turn out to be. I mean, yes - I'm generally a nice gal, and I like doing nice things for other people. This isn't "The Secret Life of a Pregnant Teenager", I'm not an ax-murderer, I don't have any drug or alcohol addictions, and I'm a hugger.
But that doesn't mean I'm going to be an awesome mom. Along with motherhood will come the serious stuff. After the first several months of breastfeeding and making sure Leo is on his way to being a healthy growing boy, there is a LOT of stuff I don't have the answers to:
Will I finally finish school? I used to be extremely embarrassed to admit that I never did, but what's the point in hiding it? I have accomplished a lot of creative endeavors over the years, and hopefully my soul will thank me later on - but music and creative arts and all things that get my motor running does not bring a satisfying paycheck to the table, not without a piece of paper aka a degree proving that I'm as awesome as I want to believe I am.
Will I be successful upon re-entering the work force PLUS be a good mom to Leo?
If I didn't have my family's support, could I do this ALL ON MY OWN?
What will I tell Leo when he starts wondering why other kids have dads, and he doesn't?
I mean, we're talking about raising another human being, here.
That's a lot of pressure... to NOT SUCK AT LIFE.
This may just be all the baby-development reading material, but I
realize more and more that we're ALL still developing, even as adults.
My aunts, uncles and parents are STILL learning something new about
themselves every day, whether they want to admit it or not. Or maybe I'm
just trying to reassure myself because when I was a kid, I thought I'd
have all the answers by now. You know, the whole husband + white picket
fence + stable career = happy ending/beginning equation. It's quite
obvious that at my age of 32, I haven't quite figured out that
picture-perfect life yet, but I do know that I feel closer to it now
that I'm going to be a mother.
So maybe I recently just had a really good cry and got the heebie-jeebies out of my system. And maybe I just rambled on and on in this blog entry, with no real solution to my problems. But it's kind of nice to just get it out there, and try to focus on good vibes AT LEAST until the baby is born.
Speaking of which... COME ON LEO! I wanna see yer little face and kiss yer little feet, already. <3
This last shot is for my friend, Danny... he seems to like the pose that's at the top of this blog, so here ya go, Danny!!
I'm guessing this whole labor & delivery thing is going to be happening within the next couple weeks. That's only a semi-educated guess, though. Little Leo has started to "drop" which is also known as the "lightening" stage of pregnancy. Basically my bump is tired of defying gravity, the baby's head is starting to be cradled a little looooower (if you catch my drift) and my tummy just looks and feels lower/heavier.
This, of course, makes everything that much more difficult for preggo. This morning I woke up, had breakfast, made my bed, unloaded and folded laundry - and at that point, was completely out of breath. I felt so lame! But after I rested a little bit, I took the dog for a good 30-minute walk, came back for a shower... and now I NEVER WANT TO MOVE AGAIN.
Haha, just kidding. But seriously, folks. I'm so ready... are you?!!!!
Okay, after reading this through, I thought I'd plug in a little disclaimer here at the beginning.
Warning: I get pretty darn whiny. Plus there's a gross picture of a slug-like character from Star Wars featured below, and if you'd rather not see that, then possibly skip this particular entry.
There... you've been warned! ;-)
Here's the deal, folks. The accelerated rate at which Leo (not to mention my uterus) has been growing as of lately is ALARMING. All those times I complained before about having to roll out of bed, or waddle across a parking lot... I take it all back!! I am currently super-huge, and almost 37 weeks.
I've heard about many preggos at the end of their third trimester just throwing their hands up in the air, saying "I give up! Get out already!!"
I totally get it now.
I've really been trying to hold on to the fact that the longer Leo stays in my belly, the more his lungs and other important stuff can mature before he makes his exit. But as soon as my doctor (and aunts who also happen to be nurses... believe me, I got a lot of those!!) reminded me about 37 weeks being okay for the baby to be born, I'm like... LET'S DO THIS!
I just got back from a brisk waddle walk, and it kind of felt like I was going to bottom out. I can just imagine Leo's huge skull basically knocking on the door to get out, if ya know what I mean. But no real contractions yet. Just mild tightening here and there. Is it weird that I'm pretty much anticipating that part? I evenly downloaded a little App on my phone to time contractions. I don't want to be one of those moms-to-be that shows up at the hospital at the first signs of pain, only to be sent home.
I am *so* ready for this baby to be born. This new feeling has now taken over the fear of pain that comes with giving birth. I am definitely ready to NOT be a whale anymore. I am ready to feel human again!! I'm over all this bulbous Jabba-the-Hutt stuff.
Guess which of these two characters I feel most like at this point?
Also, thought I'd mention that once again, all the clothes that have been so forgiving in the
stretch department these past few months are now buckling under pressure. I have about 5 tops
and 2 pairs of pants that I can still truly feel comfortable in.
If Homer can pull this off, maybe I can, too.
I wonder if we've got any muu-muus in storage somewhere?
From here on out, I'll be checking in with my doctor every week, instead of every 2 weeks. That means it's business time! She reviewed the notes from my ultrasound, and it seems that all is well. First of all, baby Leo is vertex (meaning he's in a head-down position...which is perfectly perfect, though I've heard they can spin around and become breech within moments of birth, but we won't think about that now...)
I was looming over her shoulder at the notes and caught the phrase "fetal sex is indeterminate..." WHAT?!! The ultrasound tech literally POINTED his little testicles out on the screen for me. That's kind of weird that it says that, right? Is Leo gonna be a Leah? I mean, I've heard from three different sources during ultrasounds that he is a boy ...so what gives?
I unfortunately forgot to ask because Dr. P was on a roll with the comments.
Regarding Leo already being 6 lbs & 3 ounces as of Monday 3/12: She said she isn't too concerned and is "pretty convinced" that this won't be a C-section baby, according to all the other information she's been gathering over time. "But," she added, "he is a little bit on the bigger side. So I need you to walk at least 30-40 minutes every day. This isn't exercise for your baby's size, as these are the last few weeks, and he's gonna grow at the rate he wants to, whatever you do. The walking is more to help bring about labor more quickly so that the delivery is easier for YOU."
Some books say that at this point, the baby puts on about one ounce per day. That means he'd be 6 lbs and 7 ounces today, and almost 7 lbs by next weekend.
Hmph.
Of course I've been wanting him to simmer in there until the full 40 weeks, so that all his insides are strong and stable to survive out here in the real world. But technically - 37 weeks is considered full-term, and it's completely and routinely safe for the baby to be born at that time. That means the earlier, the better? Or at least as soon as I hit the 37-week mark, which is a week from tomorrow.
I have been walking, but it hasn't been every day. I was doing pretty well about a month ago, I must confess. But as I grow larger, the more difficult it is for my brain to get motivated. I usually take the dog for a 20-25 minute walk... so I'll just give myself a little kick in the butt and keep Sarge on the leash for another 10 minutes or so. It's just so HARD to really *WANT* to work up a sweat, when all I really wanna do is either take a nap, or eat, or stare at all his little nursery thingamabobs, or check my overnight bag for the umpteenth time, or look at his ultrasound pictures, or read my pregnancy books... etc etc etc.
I have gained about 30 lbs during this pregnancy... and it's all going to my belly. Seriously. I didn't get bigger boobs, I don't seem to be growing wider at all... it's all about the tummy + uterus + amniotic cushioning + 6-plus pounds of baby-ness out in front, saluting the world with a "Hey y'all, check out my fancy waddle!"
Sigh. Okay, okay. I'll do it. Apple a day, and all that jazz.
I just better not go into labor while I'm picking up doggy doo-doo.
But if Natalie Portman could do it, then gosh-darn it so can I! Maybe I should get a little action figure statue of her, and she can be my own personal patron saint of "You Can Do It" vibes...
Anyone have a pregnant Queen Amidala Star Wars action figure they can lend me? Haha jk
Now that the baby shower's over and the nursery is almost complete (save for the actual baby to put it in it!), I turned my focus to the fact that I have only ONE month left of pregnancy... possibly less. I have my hospital's pre-registration ready to go... and am now putting together my overnight bag.
Here are a few items that both the hospital and a few websites recommend to bring:
+ A nightgown - I sleep in yoga pants and tank tops. I don't own a nightgown. I know that many hospitals provide you with a paper-thin hospital gown with that embarrassing flap in the back that exposes just a *little* too much when pacing up & down the hospital's hallways... but I want to be as comfortable as humanly possible - so I took their advice and grabbed the most non-frilly one I could find from a bargain department store. It's knee-length and sleeveless and no-nonsense. Score!
+ A robe - The only bathrobe I own is lipstick-red, huge, super-thick, makes me look like a mix between Hugh Hefner and Santa Claus, and it was a present. I don't want it to get ruined with all my labor yuckiness. So I now have a simple cotton robe that breathes yet still provides a bit of warmth.
+ A binder for your birthing partner(s) - This contains hospital forms, my insurance info, copies of my ID and other important stuff, cardstock for Leo's footprints for either a baby book or framing later on, vending machine change, and a phone list of VIP's to call or text when the time comes!
+ Other miscellaneous stuff: comfy non-skid slippers, socks, underwear, travel-sized toiletries & bathroom stuff, water bottle, camera + battery charger, clothes to go home in, and a Boppy pillow to help with initial breastfeeding once Leo has arrived.
I also have a diaper bag ready to go - with Leo's coming-home outfit and blankets and wipes and all sorts of goodies. :-)
All packed up for the big day!
Braxton Hicks
I felt my first "practice" labor pains a couple days ago. My tummy (or more accurately - my uterus) has tightened up before, but there was never any serious pain that came along with it. I could go about my business as usual, walk around, talk, etc. If you could've felt my tummy while it was happening, it was hard like a rock. Probably the way a six-pack feels on some super muscular person... only a LOT more round! Imagine knocking on a basketball... haha!
LOL... gotta love stock photography.
This time around, it was the same tightening - just a lot more intense. Try clenching your fist as hard as you can. That's what my tummy felt like. It only hurt when I tried to move, so I basically just froze in place. And then it was gone in about 3 minutes or so. I kept waiting for it to happen again, but I guess it was just a limited time offer or something.
Latest Ultrasound
Many of you may remember that I semi-recently had an elective 3-D ultrasound... which was of course super awesome, as we predicted it would be. Yesterday I had my last standard medical ultrasound. It's a lot less romantic, taking pictures of blurry black & white blobs. It was still neat to see his heart beating again, the umbilical cord, his spine, his big ol' skull... etc etc. After the ultrasound tech lady did all sorts of measurements, she estimated me to be more like 36 weeks (I thought I was at 35) and Leo already weighs 6 lbs and 3 ounces!!! The word on the street is that 7 lbs is ideal for a vaginal birth (sorry if this is getting too TMI... but this is a friggin' PREGNANCY blog so deal with it... haha!) - so I'm a little worried that he's gonna get all Andre-the-Giant on me these last few weeks. I think I need to cut back on carbs... and lay off any sort of sugar at all.
Sad & pouty mama moment of silence.
:(
The ultrasound tech also guestimated that my due date would more likely be around April 9th - give or take a week.
I asked if everything looked normal & healthy, but apparently she isn't allowed to tell me that sort of info - and I'd have to wait for my next doctor's visit (which is this-coming Friday).
If you're grossed out by naked pregnant tummies, then I highly suggest you avoid clicking the "play" button below ;)
I caught a few seconds of Leo kicking from inside his little "uterine abode," as many magazines like to call it. Kinda reminds me of that Kevin Bacon movie... Tremors.
What a classic. Let's hope Leo's a lot cuter than those underground monsters, shall we?
